Waiting Game -- Where is the WBC??

Dear Fod's,

Hi everybody. I had a nice surprise just now. Joe was at a meeting downtown that was supposed to last all day and he showed up here a few minutes ago. He still looks nice in a suit. When he surprised me, I really lit up. He can still make me see stars -- or is that the chemo? I was trying to get up the energy to blog today, but I am too tired. Good thing that the typing lackey is here now and still under my firm control.

Still no white count, hgb 8.2, platelets 13. These all sound low, but I have not required blood products for several days. I am taking this as a good sign that these counts are holding their own and not falling and maybe the wbc is just around the corner. Dr. Porter and Heather popped in for a visit. Did I tell you all that he had a baby boy 2 weeks ago and is he ever the beaming father or what? This is his first child. Dr. Porter said that my wbc should start to recover on Sunday or Monday -- but these things are on there own timetables. I still will feel better once I have some fighting ability back in my body. My kidney and liver functions are back to normal. That was a huge scare for me. They are being very cautious where my kidneys are concerned. I do not want to survive this and end up on dialysis! Unfortunately, the killer sore throat continues and I am not able to eat except for soft foods like pudding, jello and apple sauce which I have in good supply in my fridge.

The doctors and nurses are now scolding me for not using more pain sedation, but because of my allergies and nausea, the only thing that I can take without side effects is dilaudid -- a potent IV narcotic. So I take it at night for sleep, but tough it out during the day because of constipation. Drs. Porter and Millard have told me that their first goal is to get me out of here and their second goal is to minimize the pain and to please stop being stubborn. Can you imagine, me the "bullhead" of Lansdale being stubborn?? (lackey gone wild again)

Enough about illness. Of course, everyone knows that I am a nurse and spent 30 years in ICU. I too loved it most of the time, but had many frustrations with the physicians and was a strong patient advocate. From as long as I can remember I wanted to help to fix people and keep things neat and tidy. Other than my children, which are my greatest achievements, my nursing career is what I am most proud of. I love taking care of the patient at the bedside. Shut the door, give them long baths, soak their feet, help them to the chair, these things gave me great satisfaction. I miss it terribly, but could no longer do it physically. The way health care is going, I was not able to give the type of care that I wanted to give. Actually, a bunch of us left ICU at the same time and went to the surgery center, where I worked for about 2 years before I got sick. Wonderful group of caring doctors and nurses. We shared a lot of laughs there too. I hope to get back there if I can ever recover my strength after this, even if it is only one day a week. Along with taking care of patients, it was a great social event.

Joey -- never knew you wanted to be a Chippendale dancer or did you really want to be a chipmunk on the Chip and Dale cartoon show!! Your comment about the robot in training is certainly true, however, there is no robot in that house, you buggar!!! (lackey on fire now). You are so darn funny. You should blog every day to keep us howling with laughter. I too miss our ice cream socials where we laughed all the way home over nothing. Just giddy with being with each other, I guess. We are too peas in pod, except for "thunder and lightning."

OK -- that is all for today. Thank you for the cards, blogs and prayers -- they keep me going in this isolation.

Love to all.

Debbie